Sunday, March 12, 2006

Sunday Stuff

What a strange day, I woke this morning, feeling so irritable, wanting no one around me, the worse thing about it, those are the days when no matter what...someone wants spend do. But instead of trying to go along, and get along, I was honest, I told them, I am feeling totally bitchy, so when I need some space, please let me have it. It worked, later, Miss Daughter and I had a mutual bitch session, laughing during most of it.

In fact, since she is feeling better, I decided to take her with me on my turn to do the supermarket thing...which I hate, but we have fun when we do it together. Looking back on our little outings, I sometimes wonder what other shoppers may think of us. As we are usually so involved in our little conversations that we notice no one the time we were caught by one of her school friends doing "The Morgan" (yes, like in the commercials) in the spirit aisle at Target.

Today was a department store day, to purchase some stockings, and look for shoes for her to wear in a fashion show next week. The problem with us when we shop together, is that we are very vocal when we see ugly things...I inadvertently insulted a woman today, she was in the process of purchasing a blouse...that I had said was destined for the shredder, it being the ugliest thing I had seen in months...of course Miss Daughter was also in the midst of a fit of giggles because of my mouth.

Next came the really fun stuff, as a mother I am still in a quandary...she decided today...was confide to Mom day...she told me...last weekend, she got drunk for the first time...then I got all the details...OK...she is 16...I can look back at my teen years, and tame compared to me...breathing a sigh of relief...getting drunk but in an intelligent driving, or riding around in cars. Deciding to stay sober on night number two so that she could babysit someone else who planned on getting totally trashed.

So I give her my two cents punishment as long as she continues to behave in a somewhat sensible manner, and I once again warn her of some of the dangers...OK, that went well...

Then out of her mouth pops..."I am such a terrible teenager"

"Why do you say that?"

"I shouldn't be telling my Mom this stuff, teenagers aren't supposed to do that."

"Why not?"

"We're just not."

Jokingly I say, "But I am a cool Mom, as long as you tell me, then I can deal, try to keep you as safe as possible."

"Yeah, but still."

"I still have one secret I haven't told you."

I am thinking...damn! What now? I know she doesn't do drugs, she is very outspoken among her friends about that, has even lost some over it. So, what? Has she lost her virginity?

"Okay, you have to tell me now, the thoughts running through my mind!"

"If I tell you, you can't ground me, you can't tell Dad, you can't tell (her brother)."

"OK, I will promise you that."

"Don't worry, I am still a virgin."

OK, thinking, there are other forms of sex, so I mention that.

She smiles and looks at me.

So I say, "Is your mouth still a virgin?"

She laughs, "Yes, my mouth too."

Another time for me to bring up, the fact that condoms are necessary for oral sex also.

"Yes, Mom, I know, diseases can be spread through oral too."

"So what? What is this big secret?"

She pulls down the waist band of her jeans----thank god we are sitting at a stoplight----and says, "I have a tattoo."

Sigh of relief, but still thinking, how do I respond to this? Not liking this but one bit, but very happy she is still a virgin.

I look. A very tasteful one inch 'mystery rune.' Again, I am thankful, it looks almost professionally done, not like some I have seen.

"How did you do it? When did you do it? Where did you do it?"

I get the whole story, the funny part to me, is...she said, by the next morning she had forgotten she had done it, then while showering, she remembered it, and she cried.

"Why, were you sorry you had done it."

"No, I like it, it was because you didn't know about it, and I thought I could never tell you."

I still don't really know how to handle this, if I appear too accepting, then what's next?
I am happy she trusts me enough to tell me these things, I never had that with my parents.
It is also something I have to keep from her father, I made a promise.
Keep this one simmering awhile I guess, and continue to be thankful that she confides in me, feels safe to do so, and hope she continues to think before she acts. Sex and drugs worry me the most, so even though I disagree with the tattoo, I am still breathing easier. And, thankfully, she chose something small, tasteful, and in a very inconspicuous spot.

My other excitement of the day...I collect oddball cereal boxes, the more whimsical the better, if Disney had a movie, and a cereal was marketed I have the box...and others first was a box of Urkelo's......yes, from the TV show Family Matters.

Today, I squealed (literally) in the cereal aisle, they have Pirate's of the Caribbean cereal, with mister multi-talented-sexy, oh-so-hot-Johnny himself pictured on the box! We bought two.

What will I ever do with this bizarre collection? Dunno, but such a little thing to make me happy, and I can deal with that.

Miss Daughter came up to me a little while ago, and asked me if I hated her :(
I asked why, she said because of the tatt......poor thing, still don't know how to handle all this, but one step at time. I think her guilt has been a burden for quite some time, she has had it over a month.

In the continuation of our conversation, and talking about her friends who are 'bad girl wannabe's', worrying about them getting pregnant, she told me she almost got "teabagged once".

"You what? What the hell is teabagged?!?"

I have never heard this term before...

"Mom, what do guys have that are like teabags?"


I was speechless. Then I burst out laughing.

After I gathered my wits, I of course, had to hear the story. Seems she fell asleep watching TV at the home of a boyfriend, she woke up as he was attempting to...umm...teabag her...

What does my oh so wonderful Miss Daughter do?

Oh yeah! She busted his balls! Fist right in the teabag! Gotta love her!


VA Nurse said...

I hate grocery shopping...ugh...having to , first buy them...then load them in the car....unload them when you get home..then put them all

I hope that when my daughter begins her escapades, she will be as open with me as your daughter is with you. I think it's great that she feels comfortable enough to let you in instead of pushing you away.

*Thinks back to teenage years* Oh, God, I hope she has more sense than I

Sunny Delight said...

Me too at the grocery shopping, but with her I do have fun. Maybe that is it, we have fun together. I thank God on many days that she is willing, and even likes to spend time with just me.

As to being a teen-ager, I can only hope that she continues to have much more sense than I ever did. It was a blessing for me to have a daughter, in so many ways, she helped me find me again, wanted her to grow up to be a very strong-willed young woman, and she is.