Friday, April 20, 2007

Meaning

Words, there are days when certain words will circle 'round and 'round in my head. Until, I finally have to examine them, look for their deeper meaning.

Since late Wednesday, one word has been rebounding in my head, conjugating many more.

Respect
. A friend used it in an emailed discussion with me, and, as I kept pondering, wondering, contemplating respect, others began to appear. And, what we do to authenticate them.

Definition of Respect: esteem for or a sense of the worth or excellence of a person, a personal quality or ability, or something considered as a manifestation of a personal quality or ability. To show regard or consideration for.

Synonyms of Respect: reverence, regard, honor, veneration, consideration, esteem, admiration, love.

And, there, they were, those words that were resounding within me, all there, in respect to the word Respect.


Admiration, Reverence, Consideration, Veneration, Honor, Regard, Love.


Hmm, so many words, to describe one word, synonyms each, yet all having slightly different connotations.

How does one show respect, how does one honor another, demonstrate love?

In another communication, I made the attempt to explain, how through the use of words, I was trying to demonstrate a depth of feeling. It was, in effect, an action, one which had deeper meaning, than just the use of words, yet, solely through the use of words. Words were, all I had to convey how I felt.

Again, and again, I ask myself, how do we do it? How do we use actions, combined with words, to convey real meaning? Have them understood, and accepted for what they are.

Words alone, cannot do it...........actions alone, often cannot do it.

Bestow respect?

So much is involved, it is listening (or reading) with intent. Aspiring to convey to another, that we give credence to their thoughts, words and actions. A demonstration marking our admiration/love/esteem for another. Positive acknowledgment of differences, perhaps, even highlighting and celebrating those differences. It is being solicitous of another, and expressing it. Affirming the feelings of another, caring.

In the process, understanding, that no matter how we may deny it, our actions, and words, do affect the feelings of another. Acceding, that no matter how we try to deny it, we do allow the words and actions of another to affect us.

In a comment on another blog entry, I made mention of a nibblet of a memory, in which the people of another country, greet each other with the words , "I see you". I don't remember which country, or culture, I especially do not recall which language. I even tried googling it, but couldn't find it, I do know why that particular phrase sticks in my memory........it demonstrates respect in one form of another.............."I see you today, I hear you today, I care about you today, I love you today."




I have been trying to walk, or walk/run most nights for the past week, usually Miss Daughter is with me (chattering away), but last night, she didn't feel like going, so I went alone. I took my MP3 player along this time. On replay was the song below, somehow, it seemed to fit my mood, fit my thoughts, fit the words.


Mary Chapin Carpenter's ~This is Love~

If you ever need to hear a voice in the middle of the night
When it seems so black outside that you can’t remember light
Ever shone on you or the ones you love in this or another lifetime
And the voice you need to hear is the true and the trusted kind
With a soft, familiar rhythm in these swirling, unsure times when the waves are
lapping in and you’re not sure you can swim
Well here’s the lifeline
If you ever need to feel a hand take up your own
When you least expect but want it more than you’ve ever known
Baby here’s that hand and baby here’s my voice that’s calling, this is love,
all it ever was and will be
This is love

And if you ever need some proof that time can heal your wounds
Just step inside my heart and walk around these rooms
Where the shadows used to be, you can feel as well as see how peace con hover
Now time’s been here to fix what’s broken with it’s power
The love that smashed us both to bits spent it’s last few hours
Calling out your name, I thought this is the kind of pain
From which we don’t recover

But I’m standing here now with my heart held out to you
You would’ve thought a miracle was all that got us through
Well baby all I know, all I know is I’m still standing
And this is love all it ever was and will be
This is love

And I see you still and there’s this catch in my throat and
I just swallow hard till it leaves me
There’s nothing in this world that can change what we know
Still I know I am here if you ever need me
And this is love

And if you ever think of me let it be around twilight
When the world has settled down and the last round of sunlight
Is waning in the sky, as you sit and watch the night descending
A car will pass out front with lovers at the wheel
A dog will bark out back and children’s voices peal
Over and under the air, you’ve been there lost in the remembering
And if you ever wish for things that are only in the past
Just remember that the wrong things aren’t supposed to last
Babe it’s over and done and the rest is gonna come when you let it

And this is love, all that it ever was and will be
This is love, when you let it, if you let it now
This is love, all it ever was and can be
This is love

7 comments:

deb said...

"I see you today, I hear you today, I care about you today, I love you today."

I think that's what we all want, to be seen, to be heard, to know and feel deep in our bones that we are loved, just as we are. It is a gift to be listened to, to know that someone else has listened to you, thinks that what you have to say is worthwhile to remain present.

As you may have guessed, I don't get a lot of that. I'm working on giving it though.

X. Dell said...

(1) There's also the old Petula Clark song, "Call Me."

(2) One of the strengths of vverbal communication is that it can precisely express some abstract thoughts. One of its weaknesses is what you've pointed out here--the inability to convey the extrarational context in which we actually perceive the world--unless we're under some kind of medication that shuts off our emotions.

(3) R-E-S-P-E-C-T, find out what it means to me.

I know that sounds glib, but it's interesting that Otis Redding probably thought very long and hard about the connotation of that song when he wrote it. After all, he invites us, the listener to find out what it means to him, just as you ponder what it means to you.

Sunny Delight said...

deb,
"I'm working on giving it though"

Perfectly said.....we should give it.....

Receiving it, depends on so much, not always just our own actions (we do have to deserve respect), but the ability of other people to understand that actions do have consequences beyond the superficial.

x.dell,
"Call Me" does indeed express it. Surprise, surprise to me, I can 'hear that song in my mind', such an unusual occurrence for unmusical me. Redding's song I cannot.......gonna have to download it to get the meaning behind the words (smiling).

Aw, sweet man.....I am a fumbling fool when it comes to expressing an abstract thought verbally, I ramble and stumble over my own tongue. Thus it takes hoping my words, are perceived as intended.

Each individual's personal perceptions, so difficult for some to realize that all are different......thus relationship clashes, cultural clashes, religious clashes, and so it goes.

Fiona said...

RESPECT...there's nothing greater than to offer it up willingly...and to have it given willingly

And I do believe it is at the cornerstone of relationships and can be demonstrated in tiny ways as well as big, consequential ways.

I love Petula - I have such fond memories of our 8-track system playing her tapes, with that oh so annoying and yet oh so endearing click between tracks!!

Sunny Delight said...

fiona,
I believe with you that respect is a cornerstone.

The hardest part, I think, of showing another that we respect them, is once again, their perceptions vs. our own perceptions.......at times those seem to match perfectly......with other's it seems the 'twain do not quite meet'....thus at best, faltering communications, and misunderstandings.

8 tracks! I think I still a have box of them up in my attic!

My children have not ever heard an LP played, they would at least look at them as antiques......an 8 track...would most likely cause laughter.....or they might think it an oddly sized VHS video.....you are aging us darlin' *S*

Fiona said...

And this is love, all that it ever was and will be
This is love, when you let it, if you let it now
This is love, all it ever was and can be
This is love


Never has it been said better than this.

Fiona said...

My children have not ever heard an LP played, they would at least look at them as antiques......an 8 track...would most likely cause laughter.....or they might think it an oddly sized VHS video.....you are aging us darlin' *S*

of course I was very VERY young at the time ;)