Monday, March 03, 2008
So Ready for Spring
Draped upon the edge of exhaustion. I have been feeling such for days now.
Today, was/is Monday, and I think it is truly one of the few times in which I truly knew why some people say they dislike Mondays. It felt as if I were moving through a light fog of fatigue...the more alert I tried to become...the more difficult it became. 'Twas indeed a relief when the work day approached its end.
I realize a part of the fatigue is it being that time of year in the Midwest, it is March, we know Spring is approaching...but the weather is not fulfilling the promise. Yesterday it was 64 degrees Fahrenheit, this morn it started out in the mid-fifties but by noon it had dropped back down to 30-something. In addition the gray skies were filled with rain that soon turned to snow. I am ready for spring, we are all ready for spring.
Yet even with fatigue overwhelming me, there were bright spots to the day. When I returned home from work, I was very pleased to find Mr. Son had taken the responsibility to take the puppies outside for a bit of play and their necessary eliminations...I feared he would not. Something I am beginning to realize about this eldest child of mine...even though he has many wonderful qualities... he also possesses some that are not so great, although his penchant for depression does play a part, I have also come to realize that this young man is quite self-involved at times. Too often...there is so much he just does not seem to notice unless it directly affects him and his comforts. But today, without a reminder from me, he did at least realize the "babes" needed care. Although it does help that they are both quite vocal when the need arises.
When I entered the house, I found Mr. Son at the computer, researching recipes for trail meals, he tells me he is planning on leaving the 15th of April, and hiking the Appalachian Trail. That this time he intends to do it right...and to stick it out until mid-summer before he must return to be the best man in a wedding. I must confess, after the last time, I do not completely trust that he has the fortitude to really do it. But I do have hope he will, I also will applaud him every step of the way. I believe it will be very good for him, he needs it. Even though I have that niggling fear all parents get...that he will be injured, or lost, I still support him, and will continue to encourage. Especially after his most recent encounter with his father. An incident occurred in which soon-to-be-ex berated him for "using his home too much". Mr. Son was in many ways, it was his escape from our eight little darlings, and their occasional need to be in hyper drive. Yet, the way in which his father "told" him of his feelings was very hurtful, and in fact probably ruined any recent upturn in their relationship. Sigh...another one of those times in which I wish soon-to-be-ex would think before expressing his anger.
Some of my fatigue has lifted in recent hours. I allowed myself a short nap, then accomplished a few much needed chores around the house. In addition, tomorrow is trash pick up day, so that had to be done. But, what really aided me the most, was something so very simple. I took the puppies outside to play. They being the age they are, they follow after me me where ever I go, so I spent time running from them, calling them to me, running away, and calling them to me again. The late evening air filled my lungs, the exercise revived my body and my spirit, and the playful clumsiness of the puppies is so amusing. Life is full of simple pleasures when we allow ourselves to experience them.
And, Spring will arrive...yep, yep it will.