Tuesday, November 11, 2008

I am...




















I am ...

A woman

With a full heart, hidden...

Somewhere in an empty room ...

With eyes not quite of autumn's gold, and yet

Neither all of summer's green;

I wonder ...

If love is a tale made for children --

A granting of sweet dreams in their innocence -

A honey-coating to help their throats choke down the bitter draught ...

I hear ...

A voice that whispers warnings, half-formed,

Bodiless as hope, until I swear I cannot draw

Another breath unless this spectre be unmasked,

His lies mangled ‘neath my righteous tread;

I see ...

A woman, proud, uncompromising,

Diaphanous as air -- less, even, than the tears

That fall in desolation about her weary feet,

Salt poison pooled upon the withered ground ...

I want ...

A measure of quietude, a certain silence,

The echo of alone which heals me of dreaming,

The nothing that stills the wanting,

The numb, the cold that laughs at pain;

I am

A woman,

hidden ...



I pretend ...

That I can live forever -- that Time

Has no puissance but that which I afford Him --

And so, I can wait, I can be happy tomorrow,

Sleep is for the dead; but its ghosts haunt my waking ...

I feel ...

Too much -- too deeply to be directionless,

Too real for imagining, and yet the familiar eyes

Hold nothing of recognition -- only my reflection --

A meeting of shadows in sunlit glass;

I touch ...

The downy wings of hope, in wonder,

In reverence, in need, in hunger;

Alas, it burns my fingers as a flame,

A sacrilege, self-defined ...

I worry ...

That I am alone; that in my longing

I have forsaken all -- but oh, what reward,

What smile divine should light the path to freedom --

And how can I but heed the siren's call?

I cry ...

For having too much, for fear of bursting,

And then, when by the pouring of my soul

I lie, a vessel emptied, I cry again

For what was had, and lost;

I am

A woman,

empty ...



I understand

That life is what you make it,

That sometimes, the coat of many colors

That marks your triumphs brightly, blends only

To loneliest of grey ...

I say

That we are made by life, shaped,

Broken, perhaps -- unmade and voided --

But always, the core of us remains, waiting

With only faith, with trust, to be reborn;

I dream

Of bluest waters, reaching

With unnatural hands toward the faded sky,

Of dolphins that wander in seas without limits,

Carrying me water-breathing past corals and clouds ...

I try ...

To lead by example, knowing

That merely the telling holds no power;

A gift of giving is merely a day, while

A gift of knowing spans forever;

I hope ...

That my darkness holds you gently,

That pain is halved by sharing, that feeling

Wields nothing past the words it summons,

Except that it touch you with only healing ...

I am

A woman,

only.



~Author Unknown~

8 comments:

Jonas said...

Yes. You are that woman. And you are loved for all that you are.

Love, Evolution, and Resilience said...

I try to lead by example knowing that merely telling holds no power...

You are so amazing woman, I am always amazed at the rush of emotion I get reading you. How I always somehow feel empowered and strong after being to visit you.

You are loved.

Sunny Delight said...

Dearest Jon,
Thank you for believing I can be more than I am.

"And you are loved for all that you are."
S

D,
I stumbled across this poem online, and it sunk so deeply into me, fitting how I feel so strongly.

I know I have been rather distant of late here in blogland, but 'tis the same in my 3D life as well.

I love reading you as well, I always leave your blog feeling the same sense of empowerment, feeling as if anything is possible if we want it badly enough.

Love and hugs,
S

Jonas said...

You ARE more than you think you are.

You'll see...eventually.

Parker said...

Sunny My darling, you are an amazing woman with a heart without bounds and a soul that shows no end to it's depth, your perspective on life and love is truely inspirational and it is no wonder I have never lost My love for you. You are honestly loved by every person who has had the privilage to have you touch them in any way. I know sometimes you struggle, but I will always be here for you, as will many many who know and care about you. stay well and I shall talk to you again.....Love you gorgeous *hugs & kisses*

Sunny Delight said...

Jon,
I treasure your faith in me.
Love,
S

Parker,
Your words leave me with tears in my eyes, and a warmed soul. I love you too.

S

Maddy said...

That's my 'culture' bite for the day.
Best wishes

Leon Basin said...

Wow, that was great. I truly enjoyed reading that.